How a Russian Agency saved an American Life Tech Support |
- How a Russian Agency saved an American Life
- Reboot to the head!
- On Naming Conventions
- The printer is "broken"
- When a user is committed to prolonging their own misery.
- I guess it was 'locked up', in a sense...
- always remember rule number 1
- I made a user cry recently (but in a good way)
- Head of the Division's Laptop battery has failed...
| How a Russian Agency saved an American Life Posted: 30 Jun 2020 01:54 PM PDT First time posting. On mobile so forgive my mistakes. Back in 2012, I used to work for a 3rd party call center that closed down for whatever reason. Used to have the name of a certain three letter foreign agency making some of our calls interesting as we did customer service for phone lines. I had been having a slow day when I suddenly got an irate woman yelling into my ears. It caught me so off guard I jumped and threw my headset. Also found out that call had been picked as a random listen in as my supervisor reacted exactly the same way and notified me to answer but add him in. It took about 20 minutes of trying to de-escalate the call to finally find out the issue. A woman in her late seventies had been trying to get her phone line fixed properly and it had not been working at all since installation 5 months prior. I continued running through the very basic troubleshooting before attempting to make an appointment for a technician to visit. Unfortunately this was just after Hurricane Sandy so many of our techs were assisting first responders in her area. She broke down crying and through the sobs notified me of something that was never marked in her account, her phone line was exclusively for LifeAlert. As soon as I heard that, I dug deep into her account with help from the billing side of the house. Found out her original agent marked it as a note on the sale account but not as specifically Medically necessary. This one mark could have cost a life. With the help of my supervisor, we updated her account and credited it for two months. She was happy to get money but preferred service that worked. Staying on the line with a tech supervisor in New York, we got an emergency tech to fully inspect the line at no cost to her only to find out exactly what happened. The first tech connected her line to the wrong apartment. Once it was fixed and she was told, she cried again this time happily. Fast forward two weeks later, got called into HR. Got told I was being put on a final alert for termination for taking too long with the call. My supervisor was told he was wrong to tell me to help and I should have hung up as soon as she began yelling at me. I put in my two weeks notice on the spot. Final part: About two months after I quit, my old supervisor called me. Turns out not long after the line in that particular customer's home was fixed she had a mild heart attack and fell hitting her head. She was able to use her LifeAlert before losing consciousness. She made a full recovery in the hospital. Her daughter had called in and asked to thank me if possible. It made me happy to know I helped make a difference even a small one in a stranger's life. Sorry if it ran long. Just popped in my head after reading. [link] [comments]  |
| Posted: 30 Jun 2020 07:23 PM PDT Waaay back when XP was new, it had a memory leak problem that, if it wasn't rebooted every 90 days at minimum, it would slow to a crawl and get flakier than Tony the Tiger's dandruff. Generally, XP would BSOD every so often anyway, so it wasn't a real problem. So, a software update goes out at one point that requires the laptop to be rebooted. It's an entirely simple fix. Reboot. That's all there is to it. This guy was proud of the fact that he never rebooted his laptop, not ever, nope. Totally refused to. ($USER_COWPOO_MODE: Activate) "Ok, then there's one other thing it can be. If the battery is low, it can suck enough power out of the power supply to keep it running but not charge. Unplug the power cable, it'll run on the battery for now." He does. I start fast-talking to check this, that and the other, verify the phase of the moon, is Mars in the house of Aquarius, anything to keep him distracted for a bit. "Ok, it looks like you might be having a problem with the battery itself. I need to see whether it's still under warranty; take the battery out and read me the serial number." (Laptop goes "Pyoo~.") "You just tricked me into rebooting my laptop, didn't you?" "Yup. Plug it back in and boot it up." "Hey, it's a lot faster now!" So sad you can't throw a dope-slap through the phone. If you'd shut up and done what I told you twenty minutes ago, the problem would already have been fixed... [link] [comments]  |
| Posted: 30 Jun 2020 08:30 PM PDT Network cabling in a corporate hellhole currently reconfiguring itself for a post-quarantine world. Network addresses have been changed to protect the guilty. Monday Network Operations: We've received an alert that switch ADDRESS04TAS03B-2 in IDF04N cannot be reached. Please check connection. Network Cabling: I'm in IDF04N and ADDRESS04TAS03B-2 is online and working as intended. Fiber on Port 51 is amber though. Network Operations: Okay, could you reseat it? Network Cabling: Done. Still amber. Network Operations: Where does it lead? Network Cabling: To a cross connect to the datacenter. Reseated the other end too. Network Operations: Has there been any work done to this switch recently? Network Cabling: Not in four months for obvious reasons. Network Operations: Okay. Can you connect the console? Network Cabling: Moving the console from ADDRESS04TAS05B. Network Operations: Okay, thanks. Give the ticket back to us. Network Cabling: Done. Tuesday Network Operations: Giving the ticket back to you. We would like you to check out Port 48 on ADDRESS04TAS03B2 as this shows as down. Network Cabling: Okay. What's the hotline so I can troubleshoot this with you in realtime? Network Operations: *11 digit number* Network Cabling: *Ring* Network Operations Hotline (Florida): Hi, how can I help you? Network Cabling: I have ticket INC########## and I would like to work with Network Operations to fix this without playing email tag. Network Operations Hotline (Florida): Okay, let me patch you to an engineer. Network Operations Hotline (New Jersey): You have reached the Network Operations Hotline. If you would like to leave a messa- *click* Network Cabling: *Ring* Network Operations Hotline (Florida): Hi, how can I help you? Network Cabling: I just called but you transferred me to a voicemail box. Network Operations Hotline (Florida): So sorry, let me try again. Network Operations Hotline (Gujarat): ... *click, click, click, Tha... ou fo.. lling netwo... ation, ho.. dialtone* Network Cabling: *Ring* Network Operations Hotline (Florida): Hi, how can I help you? Network Cabling: I'm back. Network Operations Hotline (Florida): My apologies. I have your number from the system. Let me try to get the engineer to call you directly. Network Cabling: Okay. Network Operations: ... Network Cabling: *Ring* Network Operations Hotline (Florida): Hi, how can I help you? Network Cabling: What's the number you have for me? Network Operations Hotline (Florida): *13 digit number* Network Cabling: That's too many numbers. Lop off the first two. Network Operations Hotline (Florida): Okay. Network Operations: *Ring* Network Cabling: Hi. Network Operations: Oh good, we've been trying to reach you. Network Cabling: I'll bet. Port 48 is up, green link light. Where is this supposed to go? Network Operations: It's supposed to go to ADDRESS04TAS03B port 44. Network Cabling: That's weird. That switch is six inches away from it but the cable runs all the way to a cross connect patch panel. Network Operations: Odd. Where does ADDRESS04TAS03B2 port 48 go? Network Cabling: It goes to a patch panel labeled SEC Port 3. I don't know where that corresponds to. Network Operations: And it is live? Network Cabling: Yep. Network Operations: Okay. It shows to us as down. And where does ADDRESS04TAS03B port 44 go? Network Cabling: It goes to a patch panel that was originally intended for a switch that no longer exists but has since been renamed so many times I'll need a toner to figure it out. It's also live, though. Network Operations: Curious. And ADDRESS04TAS03B is in RACK###, UH21? Network Cabling: Yes it is. And ADDRESS04TAS03B-2 is in the same rack, UH19. Network Operations: That is odd. It still shows as down. Network Cabling: Just so we're on the same page, for ADDRESS04TAS03B-2, is the serial SERIALH1N0? Network Operations: Give me a moment. No, it should be serial SERIALW16P. Network Cabling: There's no switch in this IDF with that serial. Let me check IDF04S. Nope. No switch there with that serial, either. Network Operations: Interesting. Our system has it listed as at desk 04E05. Network Cabling: Why would a switch be at an end user's desk? Network Operations: That's just what we have. Network Cabling: Oooookay. I went by that desk and it's empty, as is the whole row. Network Operations: That's disconcerting. Can you look it up in the asset inventory database? Network Cabling: Sure. Nope, no records. Even doing SERIALW only brings up one decommissioned switch that hasn't yet been thrown out. Maybe it was removed at one point? Like, is SERIALH1N0 its replacement? Network Operations: I don't know. Calling Network Deployment. Network Deployment: Hi, how can I help you? Network Cabling: We can't find SERIALW16P, hostname ADDRESS04TAS03B-2. Network Deployment: SERIALW16P? That's a lab switch. Network Cabling: Huh? I'm looking at a production switch. Network Deployment: Nope. Lab switch. It's supposed to be connected to ADDRESS04TAS03B 2/0/44. Network Cabling: Did you say "2/0/44"? Network Deployment: Yep. Goes to ADDRESS04TAS03B2 1/0/48. Network Cabling: I think I know the problem now. Network Operations: What is the problem? Network Cabling: We did a restack last weekend, but Desktop Support never adds themselves to the restack because they like to move their own stuff. Let me go find a desktop guy. Network Operations: Okay. Any luck? Network Cabling: They've all gone home for the day but I found their new digs, plus switch: ADDRESS04TAS03B2. Which is unplugged and turned off. Y'know, we really ought to be labeling these things better. [link] [comments]  |
| Posted: 01 Jul 2020 12:05 AM PDT Years ago, my family had a printer where the paper went vertically into the top instead of in a drawer. The printer was on a small table below the desk. One day, I try to send something to it, I go downstairs to get it and.... nothing has come out. The paper light is blinking red (I think blinking meant jam and solid meant no paper detected) but I don't see a sheet partway down in the stack. I open up the printer's main cover. Nothing looks amiss, so I close it again. It tries to start, makes mostly normal sounds with a slightly louder click than usual, here and there. But the paper hasn't moved an inch and it says paper jam again. Weird. I unplug the printer, make sure the paper guides are in the right position, take the paper stack out, and when I put it in, I tap the stack down a bit and plug the power back in. It seems to start up okay. But the same stuff happens when I try to actually print! Oh darn. Has the printer become a brick already? It isn't that old, and we didn't see any real signs of impending failure. I go grab a flashlight to take a closer look at the innards, in hopes of seeing something that's easy to fix at home. Okay, the wheels in the printer go round and round..... sorry. The wheels on the left side look like they're okay. Same in the middle. And the pen on the right side looks like it's fine, too. Wait, what? The pen? What the FSCK is a pen doing in the printer? Well, okay. I pulled the plug and fished the pen out of the printer. Everything else looks okay, now that there isn't a foreign object inside. Well, hopefully. Let's try and do a test print. Sure enough, it works fine after that. How did the pen get in there? Well, remember how the printer was below the desk? Well, it turns out our cat likes to push small items around the desk, and the paper slot was in exactly the wrong place so that the pen could fall into it if it fell off the desk. It landed flat inside the printer so I couldn't see it unless I actually looked down directly into it. We are lucky that the mechanics and the motor survived having the pen caught in the paper tray. [link] [comments]  |
| When a user is committed to prolonging their own misery. Posted: 30 Jun 2020 02:01 PM PDT This would be impressive levels of mental gymnastics if I weren't so disappointed. One of our "favorite" clients is someone I'll call Useless. She can only comprehend perhaps 10% of what's going on around her or in her life at any given moment, and also can't write. And yet somehow she is the owner of a software package with us, with several other users under her employ. So the other day, I went to scroll through our ticket queue while I waited for the coffee to activate the "caring" parts of my brain. I see one or two tickets further back in the queue from Useless. These tickets consisted, more or less, of the following:
So I look back at Useless's record and see that she's submitted several similar cases that coworkers have already picked up over the course of a couple of weeks. Useless, as I neglected to mention, is one of those whose parents were violently murdered in the Great Email Slaughter of 1969 and actively refuses to respond or communicate through email. You email her back, she just responds with more "I drank rocket fuel and decided to type" with a "CALL ME" at the end. We do take inbound calls as tech support, but if someone just submits a case with some vague "call me" bullshit, we respond to you via email letting you know our number, our hours, and also to let us know the best time to call if they were so insistent that we call them. Coworkers had done this with Useless, based on her account history. Repeatedly. Called her when she responded back asking for it. Somehow she was never at the phone. They emailed her back asking for a time to call and practically begging her to explain what she needed. She just demanded a call and refused to give a time where she could be reached. Rinse and repeat until people just started closing out her tickets without replying anymore. We'd made the necessary checks to make sure her site wasn't down and her software was functional. But if she couldn't tell us wtf she wanted, she could continue screaming into the void. A little later that day, there was a critical priority case in the queue from Useless, which I grabbed. Paraphrased:
"Site down" is a phrase I actually recognized, so I went to give her a call. For some brief context, software package comes with a website that we provide and let you customize (VERY limited). We even let you redirect your private domain to it. The only thing we ask you not to do is mask our domain because it breaks shit. Specifically, makes the mobile version of your website not work. As you can guess, Useless did this. Turns out, not only is Useless capable of articulating human speech on the phone, but she is also somehow reachable when her business is jeopardized. Who knew. Basically, as she explained (read: screeched), all her email to us were her supposedly ASKING us how to mask our domain so she could use hers. And also remove our branding. And since she "couldn't get a response", she did it herself anyway. Which resulted in a bunch of shit no longer functioning properly including the mobile site. I listened, then explained to her that the answer was no to both of her requests for various reasons, and that if she wanted shit to work again, she needed to get rid of the masking. Surprisingly, she was mostly just grumpy about those answers. But when she asked why no one had responded to her or called her, and I told her why? She was out for blood.
There was some more, but it can basically just be boiled down to "Karenspeak". I just sighed and cracked open the escalation form while she bitched some more. From what I understand, Useless was just as psycho with our managers, which means she goes to our head of client relations to be given an even sterner talking to where failure to be less Karen might mean we fire her as a customer. Her domain is still masked as of today. TL;DR: Karen who hates emails breaks her own site and blames us. [link] [comments]  |
| I guess it was 'locked up', in a sense... Posted: 30 Jun 2020 11:06 AM PDT I work at the Corporate Help Desk for a mid sized company with multiple locations and divisions. Thankfully we can answer our help desk calls from home so I've been doing the work from home life for the past few months. Caller: "I hit the wrong key and my computer locked up!" Me: "Oh no, does it respond if you hit ctrl alt del?" Caller: "Nope" Me: sees this caller is from a location that uses thin clients "Is this a computer or a thin client?" Caller: "A thin client." This is a potential problem because I don't have access to that Division's servers. If their session is hung up, someone with admin access will need to log them out from the server. I can do basic user account management, but they have their own IT staff to handle these calls. This caller hit the wrong button on the phone tree. But, since I'm with Corporate I always try my best to help them instead of pass them off. Me: "Oh, hm. I'm not sure what we can do. Does it respond when you click the start menu in the bottom corner?" Caller: "I don't see that. All I have is my name and 'Password'." Me: "Oh... and it doesn't respond when you type?" Caller: "No, I just have never seen this screen before." Me: "... have you... tried typing your password?" Caller: "Which one?" Me: "Your network password." Caller: types out loud "U-s-e-r-n-a-m-e. That didn't work." Me: ".... it sounded like you typed in your username, you should type what you normally try after that." Caller: "Oh, okay! tries Nope. Let me try... nope! Hmm. Maybe... Nope!" Me: "... okay, you're locked out, let me clear it. That confirms it is asking for your regular network password though." Caller: "... okay! I got it, I'm in!" Me: ... Score one for persistent troubleshooting techniques, I guess? [link] [comments]  |
| Posted: 30 Jun 2020 06:52 AM PDT Welcome back my friend to the show that never ends. We're so glad you could attend, come inside! Come inside! This tale of woe and pain is all about rule number 1: users lie. At this point in my career, I am at my third MSP...Why I keep doing this to myself I will never know. Now we are a very small shop, with only three people, and that includes the owner. This tale takes place in a hotel, with some of the most tech-illiterate people you will ever meet. TL:DR- never trust a user to do simple tasks. So the cast of characters are as follows: Me- your dead inside tech support GM- the manager of this hotel FD1-the front desk guy Boss- my boss Chaos-because he just loves to mess with tech support persons. He has no lines but is omnipresent. And away we go: *ring ring* Me- (insert company name) Peopleman_at_work speaking, how can I help you? GM- Yeah hi peopleman, its GM at the hotel, we lost all network at the front desk, can you help us? maybe log into the machines and see what's up? Me- Well, if they have no internet I can't log in...since that's done over the internet. Let's try a few things while I have you on the phone. GM- Okay, but remember I am really bad at computers. Me- That's alright, I won't ask you to get too technical. Now, you say you can't access the internet, but how about your network drives? GM- Nope, nothing at all. Do you think I should turn it off and then back on? I think I'm going to do that with both computers. Me- Please don't, We need to try some other things first. GM- Sorry, it's too late. Me- Ok, since the computers are rebooting, let's move on to something else. Can you take a look at the back of the computer towers, they are the large boxes under the desk. Now, we are looking for a fat phone cord, can you please unplug and replug it in for me? GM- I thought you said nothing technical. Ok, I've done what you asked...but not the computers not on. Me- *blink blink* did the cable you unplugged have a little clip on it, like a phone cord, or was it more like a power plug? GM- A power plug! Isn't that what you wanted me to unplug? Me- *face meet desk* No GM, it's not. Please look at the back of the computer again, below the power plug there should be a fat cable that at the end looks like a phone cord. It will have a clip on it, and we need you to unplug it and plug it back in. GM- Talk to FD1, he's the smart computer guy. FD1: Yo! What do you need me to do? Now as a side note, FD1 might know computers but he always sounds high as a kite. We never understood how he kept his job, and he has made MANY MANY problems. He eventually gets fired after a weekend where the server went down and he told NO ONE! But that's a tale for another time. Me- Hey FD1, do you know what an ethernet cable is and looks like? FD1- Sure do boss, you need me to unplug it and plug it back in? Me- Yes FD1, I do. FD1- OK boss it's done! Me- thanks, can you please make sure that the computer is booting up, GM said it was off. FD1- Booting up now. Me- Thanks, let me know once it's done. After an eternity, since I was dealing FD1 FD1- All set. Me- Excellent, but I don't see it online in my system. Can you try to access the internet? FD1- Ok, I get "this page cannot be displayed". Is that the internet? Me- FD1 you know it's not. Ok, can you please trace the ethernet cable to the wall and let me know if it's plugged in? FD1- G*d! you ask me to do a lot, I took a front desk job, cuz I thought it would be easy. Hold on! After about 4 minutes It's done! Me- Oh my G*d! What did you do? I don't see anything but the server online?!?! FD1- I traced the cable to the wall, and then plugged it back in! Me- Ok, let me talk to the guys and get back to you in a few. I hang up the phone and let the two other guys in my office know what's going on. We decided that since we can't get any worse, let's reboot the main switch. Boss- Did anything come back online? Me- Nope! Boss- OK, I'll go onsite. I call back the site Me- Ok, we are coming onsite, DONT TOUCH ANYTHING! 30 minutes later and my boss is on site. Boss gives me a call Me- What's up Boss? I see everything back online. Boss- Yeah, never trust FD1 or GM to do anything. I'll tell you when I get back to the office what happened. another 30 minutes later Me- So what happened. Boss- I don't know how, I don't know why, but FD1 and GM decided when you told them to unplug the computer from the wall that meant going to the switch and unplugging everything from the switch! Me- *Blink Blink* huh? Boss- Yeah, thank G*d I had all cables labeled with the ports on it. I would have been there for HOURS! Me- So what was the original issue? Boss- The ethernet cable on the back of the front desk computer was unplugged. They never plugged it in! Me- You have got to be kidding me! I asked them specifically to unplug and replug it! Boss- What's rule number 1 again? Me- Users lie. *face meet desk* Boss, I need a drink! So there you have it, folks. All that headache and pain for an unplugged ethernet cable. Thank you for sharing in my pain and suffering. I know that you have choices in the stories that you read, and I would just like to personally thank you for reading mine. Till next time, stay thirsty my friends. [link] [comments]  |
| I made a user cry recently (but in a good way) Posted: 30 Jun 2020 07:19 AM PDT We recently had an outage that caused a major issue with our AD server. I don't know all the details as I'm not on the team that manages servers, but all of our AD accounts were wiped out (supposedly this was due to an empty file that somehow got uploaded; this was all second hand information as I'm not on the team that manages servers). Apparently we couldn't restore from a backup because some service was randomly deleting accounts. So they made the decision to start recreating accounts and re-applying permissions they previously had. This means that when a computer gets connected to the network after all this happened, and a user logs in it creates a secondary profile. We're testing software to transfer documents/settings to this new profile to make it just like the old one, but until that's fully vetted we're doing things manually (we don't have roaming profiles). I was working with one user who submitted a ticket requesting assistance. She told me if she could just get one file from her old profile, I would make her day. She had backed everything else up but this one file, which sounded very important and hard to redo, was the one thing she forgot. I navigated to her old profile folder in Windows and found the file in question within a minute. As I was doing this, she said "If you find this file for me, I will literally cry on the phone." I copied it to the new profile and opened to make sure it worked. I didn't hear full-on crying but it was quiet for a minute and the camera she had on was pointed away from her face, so I'm pretty sure she was crying. She thanked me profusely, and I told her I was happy to help out. It reminded me that the work I do daily that seems simple for me can literally make someone else's workload ten times easier. [link] [comments]  |
| Head of the Division's Laptop battery has failed... Posted: 30 Jun 2020 06:14 AM PDT He phones the emergency helpdesk number on the morning of a massive go-live for a multi-million Euro project across 15 sites and 6 countries. "My laptop is telling me the battery has degraded and is no longer performing optimally. I need you to send me a new one." Call gets escalated to me as our site isn't going live for a couple of hours. I look up the machine info, it's a Surface. It's out of warranty, and due to be replaced back in April. Battery is not user-replaceable. I tell the chap all this, and that as soon as we're able to get stock in he can have a brand new shiny thing. Usually, this is enough to satisfy such people. But this morning he's reopened the ticket (a new one was created for the laptop order).
He is based from home. He has been working from home for the entire 4 years I've been at this company. Where does he think his laptop battery power comes from?? Edit: He's replied to argue with me.
I guess at this point I should mention the division he's head of sells electrical items to retailers. [link] [comments]  |
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