Crystal Ball must be broken. Fix it already! Tech Support |
- Crystal Ball must be broken. Fix it already!
- My dear coworker...
- What do you do for work
- Just a user thing.
- User self-administers clue-by-four
| Crystal Ball must be broken. Fix it already! Posted: 04 Aug 2019 06:55 PM PDT First time post. (on mobile so please forgive format /spelling) I work for a company that sells machine parts from 3rd parties as well as custom machined parts. It's spread out over most of the US and Canada. I work in the US based support center (been there about a year at this point, moved up since then). The year 2015. The ticket notes help recreate this retelling. So, to the story. OP - me CE - clueless employee M - my manager OP - "Good morning, this is OP. How can I help you?" CE - "I can't keep working like this. Why haven't you fixed the printer yet? It's causing major issues here!" OP - "Did you call previously about this printer or submitted a ticket?" CE - "No. Not my job." OP - "OK. Let me get some info first. Who am I speaking with? Can you confirm the branch number? One moment please. All the network office printers appear to be online and aren't reporting any errors." CE - "I never said there was a problem with the office printers!" OP - ... "Could you please elaborate then on the printer you said was causing issues?" CE - "The label printer! What did you think I meant?" (we have industrial label machines for printing bin labels or shipping labels) OP - "Which computer is it connected to?" CE - "We boxed it up already but you never sent us a return shipping label!" OP - :realization on what they were babbling about: "Is this a label printer for your shipment system?" CE - "Yes. Are you even listening?" grunt OP - "When did the issue start? Yesterday or this morning?" CE - "6 months ago!" mumbles to someone "...these idiots are going to put us out of business..." OP - :eyes rolling: "Excuse me but how have you been printing the shipment labels all this time?" CE - "I've been going to 'local po box store'. That reminds me. We need to get these invoices fixed too. It cost way more than what the sales order has listed." OP - :😒: "Why didn't you report this sooner? We could have sent a replacement the next day. This is why we have a contract with the shipper. Those values are based on that contract." CE - "Look, I don't have time to waste with you. You're supposed to be IT. I wouldn't have to report anything if you were doing your job. Just get this fixed!" mumbles "I T must mean idiots" group laughter click OP - "Hey M, just had someone on phone that thinks we have a crystal ball for all their problems." M - :smh: "Yeah, heard the tail end of that. Besides, our ouija board is broken." OP - chuckle "Yep." Needless to say we shipped replacement label printer and a few weeks later they finally ship us the broken printer back. Turns out they put the labels in upside-down jamming it and the thermal ribbon was backwards too. That was a mess to fix. Also, an apology letter, about her rude comments, was stuffed in the bottom of the box to try and hide it. This isn't the first time, nor will it be the last for those of us in IT. Coworker bought an 8 ball to give advice to those seeking a crystal ball response from us a few days later. Definitely some amusement from that since we'd tried to add the results to our phone conversations. [link] [comments]  |
| Posted: 05 Aug 2019 12:02 AM PDT I do (or coordinate) all the tech where I work. It's a small part of my overall duties but I'm often called for advice or help with all manner of things. One employee in particular is a great source of weird and whacky problems. One time really stands out. My office is less than 20 feet from hers but the first part was by phone: Coworker: hey there, my computer is broken again Me: hi! Is this Coworker? Coworker: yes, I don't know why but it's not working, I keep getting kicked out. Me: oh ok, so it sounds like the computer is turned on and you are seeing stuff on your screen. What do you mean by being kicked out? Coworker: I can't check my email. It won't let me in. Me: ok, I'll be right there At this point, I'm thinking anything but she just printed something to our copier and I'm able to use the internet, so I'm guessing it's probably a password issue. I get to her office. Me: hey, so show me what's wrong. Coworker: see? I try to enter the password and I keep getting kicked out. Sure enough, her input isn't going into the text box. What the heck? Then I notice the problem. Her desk is completely cluttered and she has a big fat file folder diagonally sitting across the top left tip of her keyboard. It's pressing the escape key down. Amazing. I point it out and we laugh. I'm just happy it wasn't more serious than that. Edit: minor proofreading/fixes [link] [comments]  |
| Posted: 04 Aug 2019 08:59 AM PDT I used to install car alarms and remote starters for an automotive shop. I installed a car alarm in customer's car that comes with a key-less entry key fob. The lock and unlock buttons arm and disarm the alarm as well as control the locks on the doors. No problems, totally routine. The next day customer returns to the shop complaining that his key fob is no longer working. He hands it to me and sure enough, no response from the car. These alarm units have a sequence of button presses etc to pair and reprogram the key fobs. I attempt to pair the customer's current fob to the alarm unit, but it fails to recognize it. Hmm strange. I get a new fob from off the shelf and try the pairing again. Works perfect. Great. See you later. It's under warranty. Next day customer is back again, same deal. Fob that I paired yesterday no-longer works and won't pair again. Grab a new one, pairs straight away. See you later. Customer returns for a third time. OK, something is fishy here. I ask the customer:
He says
(internally) Bingo! I ask him:
I pair a FOURth fob for him and tell him:
I have't seen him since. TL,DR: Welding creates powerful Photon and Electromagnetic emissions that can erase the programming on a key-less entry remote. (And probably other electronic devices.) [link] [comments]  |
| Posted: 05 Aug 2019 03:04 AM PDT It's Monday morning and this just happened to me, not the worst tech story but enough to for me to go.... whatttt ME: Okay, I need your PC name, to do this it's easy. type a full stop and a backslash in the username field THEM: "Whats a full stop?" ME: "A full stop, period?" *Silence* "The little dot at the end of the sentence." THEM: "Hold on a second" ME: *waiting.... Someone else comes onto the call, What is it you need [myname]. explain, they do it, I get PC name so I can remote on. *A FEW MINUTES LATER\* ME: *after finishing re-domaining the machine* "Okay, you can logon now." *I stay connected so I can confirm it's working* THEM: *Typing into the username field* "I only know my password" ME: *Headbanging the desk* "It's your first name and surname" THEM: "I don't know what you mean ME: (Internally speaking) "It's too early for this shit" *I proceed to log onto the AD, find the users account and his surname (being a guy I've never spoken to I only knew his first name, it was unique enough and we have a clean AD structure to find it. I then have to type it in for him* And this is why I drink at 11:00 am [link] [comments]  |
| User self-administers clue-by-four Posted: 05 Aug 2019 03:55 AM PDT This is my buddy's story who works at the help desk of a medium sized woodworking/manufacturing company. He told me this last week in a series of text messages, and (with his permission) I've written it down for you. Characters:$IT: buddy $LUSER: Office worker who is not very tech literate and disliked by IT because he is usually condescending to IT. $IT has more than one story from him. $BOSS: Boss of $USER, good friend of $IT For context:$LUSER uses a 4 year old laptop and an external monitor which is mounted on a self-made monitor stand made out of a 2-by-4. It connects via VGA because $USER for some reason refuses to use Displayport or HDMI. $LUSERS desk is in the middle of his office. $USER calls Monday morning:
$BOSS told $IT what happened during lunch. Apparently he was on the floor putting her full weight on the screwed in VGA cable, which lead to the "monitor stand" 2-by-4 fell coming loose and smacking him in the head, knocking him out and giving him a laceration that had to be treated at the hospital. $USER also got a good scolding the next day from $BOSS, after he listened to the call. $USER hasn't called the help desk since this incident, but has written an apology to $IT. Maybe we should actually bring back the clue-by-fours. TL/DR: User pulls too hard on VGA cable while under desk, monitor and stand hit him in the head. Edit 0: Formatting, spelling Edit 1: This is why you proofread. Fixed pronouns. [link] [comments]  |
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